Hi from Bangkok!

hihi everyone,


Juls & I saying hi together here from Bangkok..
Had a good time catching up with Jael
And having all the road-side food.


Hope cell last night was good!


Hugs,
Cyn

Sweet voices

ok, one last post for today. I just have to write this else i will forget.

Last sunday, while at the church library, i heard a voice..singing 'here i am to worship' perfectly blending with the sound from the guitar...i turned my head to look, and was so surprise to see that it was no other our dear Cyn! Whoa!!! I've known her for almost 2 years now, and yet, it was my first time to hear her do a solo. Keep it up cyn! and looking forward to seeing you up there on sunday service worship together with W and E.

Another sweet voice, i heard during CG 2 weeks ago...didnt realize it was coming from the person sitting quietly beside me...yes its the second J.

Thank you God. For these sweet sweet voices.


*****

One last thing, welcome to J and S, our new bloggers for this site. ;-)

Retreat...anyone?

many things had happened, we're a year older, new jobs, new status, new boss, new friends, maybe new realizations too?...anybody who is up for a retreat ...raise your right foot!!!

since it was only me, J, E, C and J who attended the church retreat, i think it wouldnt hurt to go for another one. got any ideas? speak up and let's see what we can come up with.

Reaching out...at our comfort?

Had lunch today with the girls after service. Confessed to them that i was a bit uneasy when susan announced in church that FCC is planning to reach out to the sex workers in Geylang. When i first heard of the idea of the congregation trying to reach out to other people (other than the GLBT community), i was so glad that they took the initiative of doing something like that.

Today, when she announced that the church will be opened to the geylang girls for their english classes, first thing that came to my mind was 'oh no, they will be using the toilet that i am using!'. Then after a few minutes, i came to my senses and i felt ashamed of myself. Here are these people, doing something to make this world a better place, and here i am, thinking of the toilet (which is not even mine).

C is right, for most of us, we dont mind helping people, we wouldnt mind giving them some time and effort,we wouldnt mind volunteering to do things for and with them as long as it doesnt invade our personal space. Two days ago, i was telling J how i felt so sad that Serangoon residents are strongly opposing the idea of having to build a place for the migrant workers in their area. I mean, how can they do that? if all people will not allow their area to be used for the home of the migrant workers, where will they stay?

Now, i realized i am no better than those Serangoon residents. Or maybe, i feel so bad now coz i felt so self righteous over those residents. I have judged them right away and now i am doing the same thing. I am not saying now that they are right or if they are wrong. One thing i do know, i was wrong to judge.

I feel so guilty till now. I feel like i am helping at my comfort. I would like to believe that i am just trying to protect myself while helping others. I think this is where the God component would come in. Am i not trusting enough that He would protect me while trying to do good for His people? How can i be a living testimony if i cant even share a toilet in church when i can use public toilets (i guess what i dont know wont hurt me)? Is my prejudice getting in the way of reaching out to others?

Sigh...so much for reflection on toilets. But seriously, i am gonna do something about it. I may be too far from being a mother Teresa, but maybe, sharing a toilet is a good start. ;-)

I will be joining the Geylang walkabout on the 26th of Sept and will do my best to leave my comfort at home. I will immerse and be there, not to observe and look from afar. I will be there to be with them. In the truest sense of the word.

So join me, lets support the people behind this project and help them in this endeavor. Its not much, but it will definitely make a difference. You dont need to accept that what they do for a living is right...you just have to accept that they also have a right to live in this world.

Joy List

I think my response to this is really late... But I would like to share what makes me happy. Hope you gals don't mind.

What makes me happy:

1. When I see that my family and friends are happy
2. When I dive and make people (e.g. tourists) happy
3. When I swim and do some self reflection
4. When I row so hard and start hyperventilating
5. When I row and my coach says I got it right
6. When I fetch people around
7. When I consume beer and/or stout
8. When I am there for a troubled friend (hopefully not too often)
   
9. When I go for a relaxing holiday

'I have joy in my heart. I hope you have it too.'

Our purpose on earth

I guess we all do have our moments of asking our lives' purpose
And I think this story is a timely reminder
Of what we can strive to do
as we go about our daily lives..
--------------------------------------------------------------
One day, when I was a freshman in high school,
I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.
His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.


I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'

He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.
I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.

He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.


He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends
He said yes.
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!'


He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends..
When we were seniors we began to think about college.
Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.


I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.
He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship..


Kyle was valedictorian of our class.
I teased him all the time about being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak


Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.
He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him.


Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.
I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'


He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.
' Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began


'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years.
Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.


I am going to tell you a story.'
I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.
He had planned to kill himself over the weekend.


He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.


He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
'Thankfully, I was saved.
My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'


I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.


Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.
For better or for worse.


God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.
Look for God in others.
Impact others

marriage of convenience ?

would u do it?

if a gay man approaches you and proposes a marriage of convenience, would you agree to it?

a close gay fren of a lesbian fren of mine brought this up to her lately. they have known each other since primary school days. her mom knows him and treats him like her own son. every since she got together with her current gf, her mom has been questioning her about their r/s -- frens or more than that? and adding in warnings like, "you better not turn lesbian, i'm telling u..." so plans of coming out of the closet had to be shelved. as for her gay fren, his colleagues have been poking their noses into his life and want to know why he's still single. btw, he's also in a stable r/s with a fellow gay man.

when she asked for my opinion, without second thots, i told her to do it! what a rare opportunity, i thot. it's like killing two birds with one stone! first, she appeases her mom and second, she could move out with her gf.

and then, she shared about why she's not so keen about it. she thinks that it's like covering one lie with a pile of more lies. and she feels insecure that way. there are plenty of 'what-ifs' and it's scary.

so, what about you? would you do it? let me hear your views...

BAKING Workshop

Shameless Plug:

S and myself will be joining the Baking Workshop for Charity cum Fund Raising for the Children's Homes. With this, we both will be challenging ourselves, to bake two cakes each, Cheese Cake and Durian Almond Loaf and all the cakes (from all 18 participants) will be given to 3 Homes:

1. Chen Su Lan Methodist Children's Home

2. Canossaville Children's Home

3. Children's Aid Society

How can you give your support:

1. As participant, we need to raise at least SGD100 and all the collected money will be divided among the 3 Homes, depending on how many kids they have. This is where you come in, you may sponsor us and rest assured that whatever amount you pledge to us, we will donate it on your behalf.

2. If you are free on that day, you can join us and give support and encouragement

3. Pray for the participants that they may be able to survive a day in the kitchen and for the kids to have a strong stomach to take the cakes (kidding, ok?).

The amount we may be able to collect and the cakes we will bake is just very little compared to hundreds and thousands of dollars being donated by other people. But i still think the cakes will bring a smile to these little kids, with each cake that is baked for them, esp for them, not just to be bought but to be baked by people who are willing and have never baked a cake before, im sure, it will bring a smile to their hearts as well. Promise, we will answer to the challenge and make the cake as edible as possible.

For those who have donated, we thank you so much, and for those who wants to give their support, we are just an sms/email away.

is LOVE enough?

We've been sharing about relationships in LUSH...and recently, i see a few broken-hearted people in church. It makes me wonder, is LOVE really ain't enough to stay in a relationship?

Love isn't just about the words, "but the meaning behind it". It's not just “you can trust me” but “i'll never make you doubt", not just “take care” but "let me take care of you", not just “I'm sorry” but “i'll never hurt you again", not just “I'm here" but “i'll never leave you" not just “I promise” but “ i'll do it", not just “don't worry" but “i'll never give you reason to worry" and not just “I love you” but “life has no meaning without you".

Maybe... love is enough to make someone stay, its what we do and what we dont do with that love that makes all the difference.

If you think LOVE just ain't enough, then, what is?

JOY List

(NOTE: Got this from an email)

Ask yourself this simple question: What gives you joy?

Write it down.

Big joys. Small joys. Write them all down.

Don’t live passively.

Don’t live your days on autopilot, forever stuck on your routine.

Fill your life with as much happiness as you can.

Live your life deliberately.


“ People cannot give what they don’t have. If you don’t respect yourself, love yourself, and meet your needs for joy, how can you do the same for others?”


*******************************************

As for myself, here are the simple joys of my life:
1. whenever i see a vacant sofa in starbucks or in any other coffeeshop
2. after watching a feel good movie
3. after the last bite on a chocolate i like
4. when i see a dessert buffet
5. when i see her smile
6. when i reach the top of the mountain and the clouds are below my feet
7. when i hear nice music while sipping coffee in a coffeeshop
8. when i see nice photos
9. when i see books on sale
10. when i wake up in the morning and i dont have any headache
11. when i go out in the morning and it feels like christmas
12. when i hear christmas songs

these are only some...its too many to mention i guess.

how about you?

Faith

A sharing from my friend's blog:

----------------------------

faith. so easy to proclaim that you have it, but so very hard to put it in practice. it is only in times of need when the value of faith is tested. but when you feel so helpless, all you can cling to is faith. because there is nothing else that you can cling on to. faith and hope.

All Christians need faith to fight off the attacks of the enemy. Faith is our shield, one of the pieces of the armor of God listed that we need to put on daily to ward off the darts of the enemy.

Ephesians 6:16
In every battle you will need faith as your shield to stop the fiery arrows aimed at you by Satan.

--------------------------

And personally, like I had shared with the gals on Tuesday,
Faith is not just wanting something
And believing it will happen
It's when you don't even know where God is
and also still believing that He ll do something
Someday Somehow..
For me, that was my new experience of faith

LIFE

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.
So love the people who treat you right.
Pray and be nice for those who don't.
Believe everything happens for a reason..
If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands.
If it changes your life, let it.
Nobody said life would be easy,
They just promised it would be worth it.

Hmmmm...

I wonder when will others post here...hehe it is starting to look like my personal blog already...

*******

Anyway, just in case someone out there is reading this site, church will be having a Women's event this coming June 29 at 4-6PM. This is to welcome other women, and to introduce FCC to them. Everyone is welcome, regardless of whether you are straight or not, A-sexual or just a fag hag, regardless of your religion and regardless of the color of your eyes, you are very welcome to join us.

So if you have some free time, please drop by and say hi.

Why Me?

So...next time, before we ask...'Why me?'...let's look at the bigger picture first...

Have a great and blessed weekend!

R

Beyond Love

Just wanna share this article by SKYE THOMAS...

quite a long read though...but i hope you get something out of it. enjoy!

R

***********

All you need is love. Love conquers all. Through love, all things are possible. We are taught these concepts about love. While it is true that love is an amazing and powerful thing capable of incredible healing, motivation, and miracles; a marriage needs more than that. If love were really the only thing needed to sustain a long-term relationship, then most marriages would never end in divorce. The ugly truth is that if we are not compatible with each other, than the road to ‘happily ever after’ will be long and difficult.

Compatibility is so much more than just agreeing that you are both morning people and that you both enjoy the same style of lattes. Compatibility is a deep and twisted dynamic involving a combination of belief systems, personality traits, hopes and dreams, psychological needs, cycles and patterns, and mutual magnetism. There are pieces of the compatibility puzzle that we can logically fix, alter, change, and manipulate, but there are other pieces that we cannot affect on a conscious level. For example, raw passion and physical attraction for each other, you can love a person’s mind and spirit but simply not be sexually attracted to them. It is like leading a horse to water - you cannot make him drink. Sometimes no matter how much we want to like someone on a more intimate level, it just is not there. Other things, like philosophies of parenting can be negotiated and worked on to find common ground that works for both of you.

There are many areas of compatibility to consider before committing yourself to a life together. Most people absolutely believe in their heart of hearts when they make those marriage vows that the love they feel for the other person will override the daily ups and downs of sharing a life together. Unfortunately, life can quite easily throw a wet blanket over the fires of your love and reduce it to quiet smoldering embers and even to die out completely. Here is a list of important compatibility factors to consider before getting married. It is not in any special order of importance, as everyone weights the various components and their importance differently. Some people really do not care about religion and spirituality while others feel that it of utmost importance. They all need to be looked at, contemplated, discussed, and evaluated openly and honestly before you make your vows rather than later in couple’s counseling.

Personality Types – It is often difficult to mix an extreme extrovert with an extreme introvert. A loud boisterous comedian won’t mix well with a quiet reserved intellectual. Opposites attracting can seem cool at first, but eventually what seemed charming and cute later ends up grating on your nerves. It is a sad fact, but at least one of you will end up feeling as if you have to be something that you are not in order to please the other. If the core of your basic personalities is not compatible, then you will have a really difficult time seeing eye to eye on a lot of other things.

Monetary Needs and Goals – If one of you has very simple needs and wants to live in a modest home without a lot of debt and the other wants to live a glamorous wealthy lifestyle and is willing to run up a lot of debt to do so, then you are likely to have some serious problems. Who will earn the money? How will you spend it? How much do you need? Money problems are historically the number one topic of argument between couples. Financial compatibility is one of those areas where you can both compromise and make a special effort to see the other person’s viewpoint. If your views are not too extremely different and rooted in some sort of psychologically driven need, it is possible to come to an agreement.

Communications Styles – There are many different forms of communication styles. Some people are verbal in their ability to express their love, others are more touch-oriented in how they communicate, and some like to show their love through actions and deeds. Incompatibility in this area will eventually cause you to feel alienated within the partnership. Quite often in couple’s counseling, it is the communication methods that end up being worked on. It is not too difficult to take the time to really study and understand your partner, get to know how they personally need to receive the love and appreciation message from you, and then make a special effort to deliver the information to them in that manner. So often, we give to others what we personally would like to receive and unless you both have the exact same types of communication needs, that is not going to work.

Extended Family – Annoying interfering relatives and close friends have destroyed many beautiful relationships. Romeo and Juliet is a classic story of just such an example. As much as they loved each other, their families refused to get along. Compatibility in this area is not about finding someone with a perfect family, but finding someone who shares a similar belief about how much outside friends and family will be allowed to influence your time together. If one of you enjoys being part of a large family with a lot of interaction and the other prefers to have limited contact with extended family, then you could have some serious problems. Neither of you should ever have to turn your backs on your family and close friends because your spouse just does not want them around, but also if you really dislike a lot of people coming and going all of the time, you should not have to be forced to live within a lot of commotion and interference either. This is a tough area to navigate, but it can be worked out if you are both really sensitive to the deeper needs of the other.

Lifestyle – For the sake of simplification, we will keep lifestyle down to just the day-to-day patterns of life. Some are morning people and some are not. Some are really into sports and outdoors activities and others would rather sit indoors and discuss philosophies of life. Some are very go-go-go action-oriented and others are quite laid back and relaxed. Some like to have lots of friends over and back yard barbeques while others prefer that their home be a quiet place of contemplation, an oasis away from the daily grind. If the two of you are not too different, then this is an area of compatibility that can be worked on and common ground can be found.

Romance – This is a mixed area. On the one hand you shared some level of romance during the courtship, but on the other hand how you continue the romance after you are married can change drastically. Some folks love cute little nicknames like Sweetie Pie and Sugar Dumpling, while others hate it and think that it’s annoyingly sappy. Some like lots of hugs and kisses while others prefer the words ‘I love you’ or ‘I appreciate all that you do for me’ instead. This is a lot like the communications area and you can definitely feel unloved and like the spark has gone out of your relationship when you are not compatible in this area. Again, we often give that which we would like to receive instead of learning what the other person needs to receive from us.

Children and Parenting – The desire to have children is extremely powerful in some people and completely missing in others. This is not an area of compatibility that can be compromised on. You either have children or you don’t. Plenty of couples have broken up over this issue. You cannot go into a marriage assuming that you will change the other person’s mind. It is rare that someone successfully changes someone else’s mind about having children. Even after agreeing to have children, couples disagree about how many they want to have and how they want to raise them. Most couples do not have compatible views about parenting. One may feel that the other is too strict, too controlling, or too demanding while the other feels that their partner is too accommodating, not involved enough, or too relaxed with the rules. However, unlike the initial decision as to whether or not to even have children at all, parenting styles is an area that can be negotiated and worked on.

Leisure Activities – All too often, first dates are dinner and a movie, going out dancing, or a romantic stroll on the beach. These are perfectly lovely first dates, but they often center around the courtship rituals instead of what the couple will really do together when they are married. While some love to camp, hike, and go beach combing others prefer wine tasting, coffee houses, and Broadway plays. With an open mind and a loving heart, this is definitely an area where compatibility can be created.

Sense of Humor – Laughter is the best medicine. Laughter is one of the best ways to end conflict and tension. A couple that laughs together and finds themselves easily smiling within each other’s company has a far greater chance of staying together ‘until death do us part.’ If one finds burping and farting to be extremely funny while the other thinks it is tacky and disgusting, then you are going to have problems. Some love a dry intellectual wit; others prefer practical jokes that involving a lot of humiliation and embarrassment. This is a difficult area to change because it is a lot like sexuality, it either works for you or it doesn’t. What one person finds funny is not necessarily something you can fix or manipulate into matching what another person enjoys. ‘A Good Sense of Humor’ is one of the top things on everyone’s list of ideal partners. Defining what that means to each of you is the key.

Work Ethic – This is an obvious one. If someone is lazy and someone else is a workaholic, then there will be compatibility issues. It is something that can be worked on together, but if one of you really wants to live the pampered life and the other disagrees, then there is not a lot you can do about it. It will eat at the relationship causing anger and resentment.

Ability to Compromise – You would be amazed at how many people find it sexy that someone always sticks to their guns. On the other hand, others really value the ability to work as a team member and to be able to make decisions from a joint perspective. It is going to depend on leadership skills, whether or not one or both of you believes in dominance and submission, self-esteem, and other dynamics. This is a hard area to change. If you are both really at peace with the idea that one of you will make all of the decisions and will control everything, then you are compatible in this area. However, if one of you wants to have that situation but the other seriously wants to be equals making joint decisions and no one person being more right or more wrong then the other, than you are not going to be very compatible in this aspect. If both of you agree that one should dominate the relationship, however you cannot agree as to who is in charge, then your inability to compromise will be a disaster. If you are not compatible in your ability to compromise, then you really cannot fix the other disagreements can you?

Sexuality and Fidelity – Most people agree that part of the marriage vows is a pledge of fidelity. This is an obvious area of importance that you must agree on. You will sleep with other people or you won’t. More importantly in this area is the general idea of sexual compatibility. There are a lot of deep psychological buttons that get pushed and triggers that go off when we are in a sexual relationship with someone. Some of them can be positive and some can be negative. Some can be consciously altered and others are buried deep within the subconscious and will be next to impossible to change. Without going into a huge discussion at this time, suffice it to say that you are either turned on by someone or you are not. Sexual compatibility is extremely important and very difficult to change. This is not the same as technique and style. That can be learned and mutually explored. There is only so much you can force yourself to do for your spouse’s sake before your own desires shut down. Natural frequency of sexual activity can also be a problem. It is not unusual for one partner to have a much higher sex drive then the other. One is typically made to feel cold and uncaring for not wanting it more often while the other is made to feel like some kind of a dirty sex addict for wanting it more often. This is an area that can be tough to negotiate, but it can be done if both partners agree to some ground rules that the first one is that there will be no guilt trips allowed.

Ability to Share – Some people are simply selfish and greedy. Others enjoy sharing everything. It does not take long to see that the ‘mine vs ours’ debate is extremely destructive to a long-term relationship. You need to agree on division of property or agree to share. The ability to share will actually hint at the core of the me/we dynamic in a relationship. Are you roommates who sleep together or are you two halves of a single unit? This is a weird area of compatibility that people often overlook but it will hint at things to come in your marriage. This is the area that causes such statements, like “I let you have children didn’t I? I care for your children don’t I? I let you have a new car didn’t I? Why do you have to keep attacking me for more money?” Incompatibility in this area will bleed into many other areas of your life and it is extremely difficult to change someone else’s views about such things.

Religion and Spirituality – You do not have to have the same beliefs and you do not have to practice the same religion. You do have to agree that you will or will not follow the same spiritual path. This is a mixed issue. For those who do not really care one way or the other, you can compromise. For someone who is extremely religious, they will need to find someone who pretty much agrees with them or they will be miserable. Love alone cannot heal spiritual incompatibility challenges. There is nothing worse than feeling like you have to choose between your lover and your god. It will eat at you until you resolve it within yourself.

Education and Intellect – Nobody likes to feel like they are stupid and nobody likes to feel that they are talking to a brick wall. Someone can be quite smart but not have a lot of formal education. Someone can have multiple college degrees but no common sense. Chances are that you are attracted to another person somewhat because they meet your minimum requirements for this area, but it does happen that people will get together for other reasons and completely overlook the importance of intellectual compatibility.

Cultural Beliefs – You need to agree that you will both be white supremacists, or you will both hate gays, or you will both be activists, or you will both be freedom fighters, or you will both be couch potatoes, or you will both be coaches and mentors to our youth, etc. It’s not that you have to work hand-in-hand, but you really can’t match a Vegan with a Butcher Shop Owner and expect them to be compatible. They might love each other, but their belief systems in this area will be difficult for both. If neither of you really cares what other people do with their lives as long as they don’t meddle in yours, then you are more compatible than couple who are passionately committed to opposing social causes or cultural belief systems.

Public Image – Some people don’t give a damn what others think of them. Some people care very much about their public image, especially if their career or their life purpose is somehow connected with the public at large. A politician and a stripper are going to have compatibility issues as a married couple thrown into the public eye every time the politician campaigns for office. That is an extreme example of course, but incompatibility in this area can make or break careers, destroy one’s ability to reach their personal goals, and can make the one who does not care what others think of them feel like their partner cares more about the public opinion than the marriage itself. For most people this is not a huge topic of concern, but if it will be for you, then you should make sure you have compatible views before you run for a high profile position.

Reliability – Nothing destroys trust faster than a series of broken promises. Without trust, love will disappear. Some people get distracted and forget to show up to meetings or forget to pick up the list of groceries on the way home from work. Will that make you crazy or will it be completely fine with you? Does it matter to you that they keep their word or do you let things slide? What about little white lies? You had better both agree on what level of trust and reliability you will have between each other or the marriage is doomed from the start.

Social Skills and Popularity – This is somewhat like the extended family and the basic personality portion of compatibility but there are a few differences. If you are the type of person who needs a lot of one-on-one time with your partner and need to feel that you are the number one center of their universe, then you may not want to marry someone who is a social butterfly with lots of friends and colleagues telephoning, dropping by, inviting them out to play, and dragging them off to group activities. On the other hand, if you are one who thrives on social activity and love your friends like they are all family, then you are going to feel tied down and caged by a lover who expects you to focus only on them day in and day out. This is an area where compromise can occur, but it is not an easy area to change.

Honesty and Integrity - How do you feel about someone cheating on their taxes? How do you feel about someone who does not give back the extra change they just received from a cashier? How do you feel about hidden pasts and skeletons in the closet? How do you feel about secrets and lies? This is another area of compatibility that people often do not bother to think about until after it is too late. It is not the same as fidelity and loyalty, but it does affect your overall respect and trust of someone. How would they conduct themselves when you are not around?

Depth of Connection Needed – Some folks are fine with a light superficial relationship and others need to be deeply connected soulmates. It is important that you and your partner are compatible in this area because if one of you wants a deeply connected relationship and the other wants to keep things light, then there will be hurt feelings. The person who wants more is going to feel the relationship is empty and without substance. The person who does not want to go that deep is going to feel like someone is trying to psychoanalyze their every thought, feeling, and action under a microscope.

Whether you are using an astrology compatibility report, a professional matchmaker, a book on compatibility, a matchmaking website with computer generated matches, your friends’ opinions and feedback, or just your gut instinct to help you find your best partner, you need to know that on most levels you and your lover are compatible as well as in love.

Yes, the relationship absolutely must be a love match because love motivates you to want to fix the problems that come between you, but you also really need to be compatible so that the road you travel together has the fewest possible potholes, roadblocks, and fallen debris in your way.

Falling in love is easy; staying in love is a whole other story.

A matter of choice?

Someone said this about being gay:

"They say its just a matter of choice... yes...we have a choice...but its not a choice whether to be gay or not...its the choice whether we want to be true to ourselves or to forever live a life that's full of lie..."

have you made yours?

R

******************

Gay Christian walks away from religious therapy

A young Christian tells Yau Chui-yan why he eventually accepted his homosexuality/ SCMP/May 18, 2008

Like many a Christian boy, David Cheung was told that one day he would grow up and marry a girl and live happily ever after. However, David became confused when he felt ashamed of his feelings while staring at other boys as a teenager. Growing up in a religious environment, he understood that some Christians considered homosexuality unacceptable, and he didn't want to worry his parents. During his secondary-school years, Mr Cheung fell in love with his best friend. He dared not disclose his feelings, "because he was a Christian and against homosexuality".

As a university student he did what his peers did and dated girls, but it just didn't feel right. Be a good Christian or follow his feelings? There seemed to be no ideal path, so he sought help.

"When I went to church, I was told that homosexuality was bad, but it could be changed.

"I was told that 70 per cent of gay people could change. At that time, I hoped God could change my sexual orientation, " says Mr Cheung, who is now 23 and studying for a master's degree.

Three years ago, he was referred to the New Creation Association, a group set up to help Christians and non-Christians deal with confusion over sexual orientation. He was told his sexual orientation could be changed through so-called conversion therapy.

Mr Cheung paid the fees and attended several counselling sessions. It was recommended that he attend group counselling on changing sexual orientation. He attended two of the group sessions, which cost him HK$1,200 each.

During the sessions, the talk was about God, self-reflection, self-discovery about gender identity and roles, how to rebuild male and female quality, controlling desires, how to get along with the opposite sex, and how to fall in love with the opposite sex.

"Instead of wanting to know the reason I wanted to change, they just sold the advantage of being heterosexual very hard. My counsellor became frustrated when I told him that I didn't want to change. He made a value judgment."

However, Mr Cheung felt some warmth during the sessions. "We could talk with each other inside the groups. There was support among us. But we were told not to communicate with each other outside the group session."

Mr Cheung tried for a year to follow the directions of the counsellors. He was told that the sessions would only be successful when he was not attracted to members of the same sex.

He says he suppressed his desires by every means possible, and the result was six months of depression. "I became depressed at the end of 2005. I could not concentrate. I felt ashamed even when I saw a guy on TV. I could not talk with others and I became very weak."

Counsellors referred him to psychiatrist Hon Kwai-wah, who is also the chairman of the New Creation Association.

"I had to pay over HK$1,000 per visit and I had to go once every two weeks. I spent over HK$100,000 for the psychiatry sessions. I had to take lots of drugs for depression. However, the side effects of these drugs made me tired," he recalls.

Mr Cheung says he was not told what it would mean for him to change orientation, what the success rate was, or even how long he could expect to need therapy.

Dr Hon could not be reached for comment last week. The Sunday Morning Post (SEHK: 0583, announcements, news) made repeated requests to the group to provide more information about its counselling and allow our reporter to interview people who had gone through the therapy. The Post also made repeated requests for the group to provide more information about its activities.

A representative of the New Creation Association, Chan Ka-leung, said the group was not able to talk in Dr Hon's absence.
In a previous interview with the Sunday Morning Post, Mr Chan said the group served "other voices" among sexual minorities.

The type of therapy Mr Cheung went through is often referred to as "reparative therapy" or "sexual orientation conversion therapy". A psychiatry professor at Columbia University in New York , Robert Spitzer, released the results of a study on homosexuality in 2001, which concluded there was evidence that change in sexual orientation after reparative therapy did occur in some gay men and lesbians.

But the study was controversial. Professional bodies questioned the findings, arguing that the study was not supported scientifically. Dr Spitzer later argued that his findings had been exaggerated by others, as the chance for change was small. Despite controversy over Dr Spitzer's study, groups like the New Creation Association still quote it to support their contention that sexual orientation can be changed.

Established in late 2002, the New Creation Association is one of several in Hong Kong offering so-called sexual conversions. According to its in-house magazine, it has contacts with Exodus International, an interdenominational Christian organisation that promotes "freedom from homosexuality through the power of Jesus Christ".

Petula Ho Sik-ying, associate professor of social work and social administration at the University of Hong Kong , says conversion therapy is outdated because it assumes homosexuality is something problematic that needs to be "corrected".

Dr Ho points out that the fourth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders no longer includes homosexuality. "It is not a sickness, so why have the treatment?"

Having practised cognitive therapy with gay people and their families, Dr Ho has decided that the chances of changing sexual orientation are slim.

"The forming of sexual orientation involves personal history and different life events," she says. "It is kind of difficult to change something which was accumulated bit by bit throughout someone's life."

Wong Ting-yim, a professional counsellor who has worked with the Mental Health Association of Hong Kong for 25 years, says it is inevitable that there would be a clash of values for a counsellor. "Of course, there are counselling institutions with religious backgrounds. As perspective matters, it is important to let the client know about other options, as most of the time the client has limited knowledge about what they are facing."

After about two years, Mr Cheung stopped the therapy with the help of a social worker, psychologist and family therapist. Instead of going back for more conversion therapy, he chose to accept his sexual orientation.

Although he suffered anxiety and depression during the therapy, he does not denounce it.

"It is a matter of personal choice. After a journey of personal exploration through trial and error, you will know your true self."

Hope & Love

MCC'S FOUNDER WINS CALIFORNIA SUPREME COURT MARRIAGE CASE!


Dear MCC Friends:


MCC Founder Rev. Troy Perry has spent a lifetime changing history
and making history -- and today, he did it again.
This morning, the Supreme Court of California ruled
in favor of the marriage lawsuit jointly brought by Troy and his spouse,
Phillip Ray De Blieck, along with MCC friend
and LGBT activist Robin Tyler, and her partner, Diane Olson.


I am thrilled to share Troy and Phillip's heartfelt statement below.
Equality for all people, including marriage equality,
has been an integral part of Troy's passion and ministry for almost 40 years.
It's worth remembering that in 1969,
as the Stonewall Rebellion took place in New York City,
Troy was already organizing the LGBT community in Southern California,
had already established Metropolitan Community Churches --
and had performed what Time Magazine has credited as the first public same-sex wedding in the United States. All before Stonewall -- amazing!


And in January of 1970, Troy made history again when he filed the first-ever lawsuit in the United States seeking legal recognition of same-gender marriages. The court dismissed the case before it ever came to trial, but it accomplished something profound: It birthed the marriage equality movement, and with it, four decades of debate, activism, struggle, prayer and persistence.


May a new generation of activists rise up and continue Troy's example of changing our world and working for an end to discrimination and injustice -- until our brothers and sisters in Jamaica no longer are attacked and killed solely for their sexual orientation and gender variance, until LGBT people in Pakistan no longer face the threat of death if found to be lesbian or gay, until LGBT people in Moldova can freely march in the streets without being targets of mob violence, until LGBT people no longer are smeared and ridiculed by the tabloid press in Nigeria, until our brothers and sisters no longer experience rejection from churches and communities of faith, until teens and young adults no longer take their own lives because they believe God hates them.


Until that day, ours is an unfinished world.
And it's a reminder that for Metropolitan Community Churches, ours is an unfinished calling.
Grace and peace,
+ Nancy
Rev. Nancy L. Wilson
MCC Moderator



The Rev. Dr. Troy Perry's STATEMENT:

Today the California Supreme Court ruled to legally recognize our marriage, which took place under Canadian law in Toronto, Canada, on July 16, 2003.

The Court's ruling says that our marriage is not less than or different from other marriages in this country; the court ruled that our marriage is equal in the eyes of the law to all other marriages.

We thank God that our prayers have been answered! This is a battle that our church, the Metropolitan Community Churches, has fought since I performed the first public same-sex wedding ceremony in the United States -- in Huntington Park, California, in 1969.
Today we both give honor to God for this victory.

On this momentous day, we want to acknowledge that we stand on the shoulders of others before us who fought for justice and blazed trails for equality, and who made this day possible.

One of our heroes died this month. Mildred Loving, an African-American who, along with her husband Richard, a white man, won the battle to legalize interracial marriage in the United States. Mildred Loving paid a steep price, solely for marrying the only man she ever loved. She was arrested, convicted, and banished from her home state of Virginia. Mildred, a soft-spoken, gentle woman, avoided the spotlight, but for the issue was always simple. In a 1967 interview on CBS News, she said, "I think marrying who you want is a right and no man should have anything to do with it. It's a God-given right."

Mildred Loving also said, "I am not a political person, but I am proud that Richard's and my name is on a court case that can help reinforce the love, the commitment, the fairness, and the family that so many people, black or white, young or old, gay or straight, seek in life. I support the freedom to marry for all. That's what Loving, and loving, are all about."

We also want to thank Robin Tyler and her partner Diane Olson. We are honored to have partnered with Robin and Diane to become the first two couples to initiate this lawsuit seeking marriage equality for all people in California and California's recognition of same-sex marriages performed in Canada.

We are deeply thankful for our attorney, Gloria Allred, and her law partners, Michael Masoko and John Goldberg, for taking this marriage equality case pro bono and arguing it all the way to the California Supreme Court. We could not have won this landmark case had it not been for Gloria Allred's deeply-held conviction that all people deserve equality -- including marriage equality -- under the law. And we are thankful to our denomination of Metropolitan Community Churches (MCC) for underwriting the court filing fees in this case.

We give honor to God for the Metropolitan Community Church of Toronto, under the direction of The Reverend Dr. Brent Hawkes, and their attorney, Mr. Doug Elliott. These leaders argued before the Supreme Court of Canada and won the right for all persons, including same-sex couples, to be legally married there. Had it not been for their groundbreaking and historic work, Phillip and I would not be married today. Everywhere we go, we proudly show our wedding bands to others and say, "Thank God for Canada!"

Tonight, we will go to the Metropolitan Community Church of Los Angeles (4953 Franklin Avenue, Los Angeles 90027, in the Los Feliz area) to give thanks for this victory for which we have worked and prayed for the past 39 years.

Is it really the Hand of God?

I know we are entitled to our own points of view, own belief, and even to our own foolishness. But to say that these recent tragedies are the Hand of God, i don't know with others, but this is one thing i cannot accept.

Yes, God may have allowed it to happened, but He did not do it just so there will be righteousness. He allowed it for a reason, but He didnt caused it. How do i know? coz i have Faith in Him.

am i putting Him in a box right now?

maybe. but maybe not. i hope not.

what do you think?


****************


A Reminder of our Fragility
10 May 2008

The recent killer cyclone that battered the low-lying delta regions of Myanmar is just a reminder of how fragile a planet we live in. As the death toll keeps mounting upwards, from an initial 351 to an official 23,000, the nation is bracing itself for the worst. Aid workers and diplomats are predicting that the death toll could rise to 100,000 with one estimate putting the number at 150,000. And while aid trickles in because of the belligerence of the Myanmar Government towards foreign intervention, more and more people end up suffering and dying. It was in December of 2004 when the giant Tsunami hit our region that saw over 250,000 people lose their lives. We had never seen anything like that happen before. At that time, many preachers were stumbling over one another trying to explain why something like this cannot be from God; that satan was the one who was behind it. All kinds of theories were espoused, but the reality is – there's no way to explain this away as though it was some freak storm or an act of mother nature.

It was the Hand of God.

Amos chapter 3 gives us an interesting perspective on the issue. A series of rhetorical questions are asked by God from verses 4 to 6 and by the time we come to verse 6, the question is asked, "If there is calamity in a city, will not the Lord have done it?" This is the crux of the matter. If a calamity strikes a city, it's because the Lord has done it. And we must be careful not to dilute what the Word of God is trying to say or explain. There's an interesting verse in Isaiah 26:10. It says that when grace is shown to the wicked, yet he'll still not learn righteousness. But the preceding verse says, "For when your judgments are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world will learn righteousness. "

So what's the issue in this matter? It's to teach the nations righteousness. That is God's goal. He wants us to learn and walk in righteousness. Now interestingly, some people will learn it by grace. When grace is shown to them, they do not take it for granted; so the grace given is not in vain. But to others, no matter how much grace is shown, they will still not learn righteousness. The only other alternative is judgment, because one way or another, God wants to teach us righteousness. That seems to be something that is very high on God's agenda. And we, as Christians, must come to that place where we do not take the grace of God in vain. When He is gracious to us, may we learn righteousness. What happened in Myanmar can only be understood if we see through the eyes of God's mercy and goodness, because He is not willing that any should perish. He speaks through the judgments.

So may we wake up from our slumber, because the end draweth nigh. The apostle Paul says that in evil, we are to be babes, but in understanding, mature. May God grant to all of us wisdom and understanding.

Pastor Yang Tuck Yoong

FAITH

just thought it would be nice to spend some time on a friday morning to share something just in case someone out there is reading this site... ;-)

this story talks about FAITH...as simple as it may sound, keeping our faith alive is hard to do...at least for me, it is. Faith without action is futile.

...may we always have that faith regardless of the circumstances...
...may we always do something about our Faith so it will not just be faith in words
...may we always be living testimonies to our friends and families

have a great weekend everyone!

rache

An Atheist Professor of Philosophy speaks to his Class on the problem Science has with GOD, The ALMIGHTY. He asks one of his New Christian Students to stand and . .

Professor :You are a Christian, aren't you, son?
Student :Yes, sir.Professor :So you Believe in GOD ?
Student :Absolutely, sir.
Professor :Is GOD Good ?
Student :Sure.
Professor :Is GOD ALL - POWERFUL ?
Student :Yes.
Professor:My Brother died of Cancer even though he Prayed to GOD to Heal him. Most of us would attempt to Help Others who are ill. But GOD didn't. How is this GOD Good then? Hmm ?

( Student is silent )

Professor :You can't answer, can you ? Let's start again, Young Fella. Is GOD Good?
Student : Yes.
Professor : Is Satan good ?
Student :No.
Professor :Where does Satan come from?
Student :From . . . GOD . . .
Professor :That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this World ?
Student :Yes.
Professor : Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And GOD did make Everything. Correct ?
Student :Yes.
Professor :So who created evil ?

( Student does not answer )

Professor :Is there Sickness ? Immorality ? Hatred ? Ugliness ? All these terrible things exist in the World, don't they?
Student : Yes, sir.
Professor :So, who created them ?

(Student has no answer )

Professor :Science says you have 5 Senses you use to identify and observe the World around you. Tell me, son . . . Have you ever Seen GOD?
Student :No, sir.
Professor :Tell us if you have ever Heard your GOD?
Student :No , sir.
Professor :Have you ever Felt your GOD, Tasted your GOD, Smelt your GOD ? Have you ever had any Sensory Perception of GOD for that matter ?
Student :No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Professor :Yet you still Believe in HIM ?
Student :Yes
Professor :According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student :Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor :Yes. Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student :Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor :Yes.
Student :And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor :Yes.
Student :No sir. There isn't.

( The Lecture Theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events)

Student :Sir, you can have Lots of Heat, even More Heat, Superheat, Mega Heat, White Heat, a Little Heat or No Heat. But we don't have anything called Cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is No Heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as Cold. Cold is only a Word we use to describe the Absence of Heat. We cannot Measure Cold. Heat is Energy. Cold is Not the Opposite of Heat, sir, just the Absence of it.

(There is Pin - Drop Silence in the Lecture Theatre )

Student :What about Darkness, Professor ? Is there such a thing as Darkness?
Professor :Yes. What is Night if there isn't Darkness?
Student :You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the Absence of Something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light , Bright Light, Flashing Light . . .But if you have No Light Constantly, you have Nothing and it's called Darkness, isn't it ? In reality, Darkness isn't. If it is, were you would be able to make Darkness Darker, wouldn't you ?
Professor :So what is the point you are making, Young Man ?
Student :Sir, my point is your Philosophical Premise is Flawed.
Professor :Flawed ? Can you explain how?
Student :Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a Good GOD and a Bad GOD. You are viewing the Concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can't even explain a Thought. It uses Electricity and Magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view Death as the Opposite of Life is to be ignorant of the fact that Death cannot exist as a Substantive Thing. Death is Not the Opposite of Life, just the Absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you Teach your Students that they Evolved from a Monkey?
Professor :If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes, of course, I do.
Student :Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir ?

(The Professor shakes his head with a Smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going)

Student : Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this Process is an on–going endeavour, are you not teaching your Opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?

(The Class is in uproar)

Student : Is there anyone in the Class who has ever seen the Professor's Brain?

(The Class breaks out into laughter)

Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's Brain, Felt it, touched or Smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the Established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have No Brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your Lectures, sir?

(The Room is Silent. The Professor stares at the Student, his face unfathomable)

Professor :I guess you'll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student : That is it sir . . . the Link between Man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that Keeps Things Moving & Alive.


NOTE: Just in case you want to know, the student is Albert Einstein

Bestfriend

got this from a friend...not sure if its real, but it definitely touched my heart...

praying, thanksgiving and believing is easy when we get and when we have what we need and want. but when we dont have the things we need , and when we cant do the things we need and want to do...that is when our faith in HIM is really put to the test.

may we all be thankful, despite of what we have and dont have...

may we all be thankful, despite of what we lost and what we might lose...

may we all be thankful, despite of what has been taken away from us...

coz at the end of the day, there's only one thing that matters...our relationship with Him.

Have a blessed week!

r

********************************************************************

Somewhere in Milaor, Camarines Sur Philippines, there lived a fourth grader boy who would follow this route to school everyday: He has to cross the rugged plains and cross the dangerous highway where vehicles are recklessly driving to and from.

Once past this highway, the boy would take a short cut, passing by the Church every morning just to say Hi to God, and faithfully say his, "Good Morning". He was faithfully being watched by a Priest who was happy to find innocence so uplifting in the morning, "How are you Andoy? Are you on your way to school?"

"Yes, father... "he would flash his innocent grin, the priest would be touched. He was so concerned that one day he talked to Andoy. "From school...", he advised "Do not cross the highway, you can pass through the Church and I can accompany you to the other side of the road...that way I can see that you are home safe...."

"Thank you father ... "

"Why don't you go home ... why do you stay in this church right after school?"
"I just want to say 'Hi' to my friend, God," and the priest
would leave the boy to spend time beside the altar, talking to himself, but the priest was hiding behind the altar to listen to what this boy has to say to his heavenly FATHER.

"You know my math exam was pretty bad today, but I did not cheat although my seatmate is bullying me for notes... I ate one cracker and drank my water, Itay had a bad season and all I can eat is this cracker. Thank you for this! I saw a poor kitten who was hungry and I know how he feels so I gave my last cracker to him ... funny but I am not that hungry. Look, this is my last pair of slippers ...I may have to walk barefoot next week, you see this is about to be broken... but it is okay....at least I am still going to school.... Some say we will have a hard season this month, some of my classmates have already stopped going to school .... please help them get to school again, please God?

....Oh, you know, mother hit me again, it is painful, but I know this pain will pass away, at least I still have a mother.... God, you want to see my bruises? I know you can heal them.... Here... here and .... oh ...blood ....I guess you knew about this one huh? Please don't be mad at my mother, she is just tired and she worries for the food in our table and my schooling that is why she hits us....Oh, I think I am in love ... there's this pretty girl in my class, her name is Anita ... do you think she will like me? Anyway, at least I know you will always like me, I don't have to be anybody just to please you, you are my very best friend! Hey your birthday is two days from now!!! Aren't you excited? I am! Wait till you see, I have a gift for you ..... but it is a surprise! I hope you will like it! Oooops, I have to go ..." then he stood up and calls out, "Father, father, I am finished talking to my friend .... You can accompany me to the other side of the road now."

This routine happens everyday. Andoy never fails. Father Agaton shares this every Sunday to the people in his church because he has not seen a very pure faith and trust in God, a very positive look at negative situations.

One Christmas day, Father Agaton was sick so he could not make it in the Church, he was sent to the hospital. The Church was left to 4 Aunties who would chant the rosary in 1000 miles per hour, would not smile and would always find fault in what you do, they were also very well versed in cursing if you irritate them! They were kneeling, saying their kilometric rosary when Andoy, coming from his Christmas party,playfully dashed in.

"Hello God! I ......"
"P----!! (a curse) bata ka!! Alam mo nang may nagdadasal!! Alis!!" (Can't you see we are praying? Go Away!!!!)

Poor Andoy was so terrified, "Where's Father Agaton? He is supposed to help me cross the street ... and to be able to cross the street I will have to pass by the back door of this church ...not only that, I have to greet Jesus. It is His birthday, I have a gift right here....

" Just as he was about to get the gift out of his shirt, the Auntie pulled his shirt and threw him out of the church. "Susmaryosep!!! (does the sign of the cross fervently) If you dont leave now, i will really hit you!!!

So the boy had no choice but to cross the dangerous side of the road in front of the church. He crossed. A fast moving bus came in.

There was a blind curve. The boy was protecting his gift inside his shirt, so he was not looking. There was so little time. Andoy died on the spot. A lot of people crowded the poor boy, the body of a lifeless young boy ...

Suddenly, out of nowhere a tall man in a pure white shirt and pants, a face so mild and gentle, but with eyes full of tears... He came and carried the boy in His arms. He was crying. Curious bystanders nudged the man in white, and asked,
"Excuse me sir, are you related to this child? Do you know this child?"

The man in white, His face mourning and in agony, looked up and answered,
"He was my best friend .... " was all he said. He took the badly wrapped gift in the bloody chest of the lifeless boy, and placed it near His heart.
He stood up and carried the boy away and they both disappeared in sight.
The crowd was curious ...

On Christmas Eve, Father Agaton learned of the shocking news. He visited the house, and wanted to verify about the man in white. He consulted the parents of Andoy.

"How did you know that your son died?"

"A man in white brought him here." sobbed the mother. "What did he say?"
The father answered, "He did not say anything. He was mourning. We do not know him and yet he was very lonely about our son's death, as if he knew our son very well. But there was something peaceful and unexplainable about him.
He gave me my son, and then he smiled peacefully. He brushed my son's hair away from his face and kissed him on his forehead, then he whispered something..."

"What did he say?"

"He said to my boy..." the father began, "Thank you for the gift .... I will see you soon ... you will be with me..." and the father of the boy continued, "and you know for a while, it felt so wonderful ... I cried, but I do not know why....all I know is I cried tears of joy .... I could not explain it, Father, but when that man left, something peaceful came over me, I felt a deep sense of love inside ... I could not explain the joy in my heart, I knew my boy is in heaven now but...tell me, Father, who is this man that my son talks to everyday in your church, you should know because you are always there ... except at the time of his death ......

Father Agaton suddenly felt the tears welling in his eyes, with trembling knees, he murmured, " ... He was talking to no one ..... but .. GOD...."

A Smile from the Heart

The tea lady at my workplace is one of the nicest person i've ever met since i got here in SG. Though language has always been a barrier, it didnt hinder us to say good morning to each other and say "ni hao ma?" everyday. and everytime she wears a new blouse, i would always tease her "aunty, ni heng piao liang!". my week is not complete without having to say "Zao an, aunty!" though my mandarin sucks, she always take the time to give me that sincere smile.

last week, i missed her coz she didnt show up for the whole week. I found out from colleagues that her husband passed away. today, she came back to work. i was so worried for her as she is already in her 70's, worried that she might feel so lonely and so depressed and weak esp now that her husband is gone. i was memorizing some mandarin words to comfort her...but the moment i saw her, she still has that cheery look on her face, she still has the smile to offer to everyone and still could say good morning even though she woke up alone this morning, without her husband.

i was so teary eyed when i ask her 'ni hao ma' today. i could see and i could feel the sadness in her eyes, but she still has that same smile every morning. and yes,she still has the same 'hao' reply.

i guess that side of her really showed how strong aunty is, despite her frailties.

i am only in my 30's and yet, when people see me, they always say i look tired. cannot even show cheerfulness no matter how i laugh or smile, its just sounds and looks so superficial.

i hope before and when i reach aunty's age, i will be as strong as she is. and will be as cheerful to others. and will be as trusting to that Supreme Being. that no matter what comes in life, my smile will still be there to brighten up someone's day.

for you aunty, who will never read this blog, this song is for you and your husband...for all those mornings he gave you a reason to smile from your heart...




A SMILE IN YOUR HEART
I had a feeling
That you're holding my heart
And i know that it is true
You wouldn't let it be broken apart
'coz it's much to dear to you
Forever we'll be together
No one can break us apart
For our love will truly be
A wonderful smile in your heart

When the night comes
And i'm keeping your heart
How i feel so much more secure
You wouldn't let me close my eyes
So i can see you through and through

You're a sweet tender lover
We are so much in love
I'm not afraid when you're far away
Just give me a smile in your heart...

You brighten my day
Showin' me my direction
You're comin' to me
And givin' me inspiration
How can i ask for more
From you my dear
Maybe just a smile in your heart

I'm always dreamin'
Of being in love
But now i know that this is true
Since you came into my life
It's true love that i had found

I pray that you wouldn't leave me
Whatever may come along
But if you do i won't feel so bad
Just give me a smile in your heart...

You brighten my day
Showin' me my direction
You're comin' to me
And givin' me inspiration
How can i ask for more
From you my dear
Maybe just a smile in your
(maybe just a smile in your heart)

You brighten my day
Showin' me my direction
You're comin' to me
And givin' me inspiration
How can i ask for more
From you my dear
Maybe just a smile in your heart

Inspiration

Do check out the youtube link to watch the dance! :)
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One couple won one of the top prizes.The lady has one arm and the guy has one leg. They performed gracefully and beautifully.


The lady in her 30s was a dancer and was trained as one since she was a little girl. Later she got into some kind of accident and lost her entire left arm. She was depressed for a few years. It seemed that someone asked her to coach a Children's dancing group. From that point on, she realized she could not forget dancing. She still loved to dance. She wanted to dance again. So she started to do some of her old routines. But by her losing an arm, she also lost her balance. It took a while before she could even making simple turns and spins without falling. Eventually she got it.


Then she heard some guy in his 20s had lost a leg in an accident. This guy also fell into the usual denial, depression and anger type of emotional roller coaster. She looked him up (seemingly he was from a different Province) and persuaded him to dance with her. He had never danced. And to dance with one leg? Are you joking with me? No way. But she didn't give up. He reluctantly agreed. ' I have nothing else to do anyway.' She started to teach him dancing 101. The two broke up a few times because the guy had no concept of using muscle, control his body, and a few other basic things about dancing. When she became frustrated and lost patience with him, he would walk out. Eventually they came back together and started training. They hired a choreographer to design routines for them. She would fly high (held by him) with both arms (a sleeve for an arm) flying in the air. He could bend horizontally supported by one leg and she leaning on him,etc. They danced beautifully and they legitimately beat others in the competition.


I would like to share with you this most magnificent and touching performance I have ever seen! It is a living proof that strong spirit can conquer any physical limitations!


Click here for video

Reflection from last night

'when you feel you've arrived but not sure you belong'

yesterday, before i went to CG, i posted a poem here, and the above phrase is a line from that poem.

after CG last night...i felt just exactly like it.

on my way home, i can't help but ask myself...

am i in the right church?
am i with the right group?
is the God that i know and love, the same as their God?

i don't know...

all i know is that God is in the midst of everything...not only for them, but for everyone...not only for christians but for non-christians as well...not only for believers but also for those who doesnt even know He exist...His love and His faithfulness is unconditional. and no book and no person could ever put a limit to that.

God is already there...

from the top of the ladder to the end of the rope,
in the fullness of joy,
in the absence of hope,
when you're lost in the crowd,
when you feel all alone,
when you're close to the fire,
when you're far from your home;
wherever you are,
whatever your care,
God is already there.


When the river is dry,
when the sun doesn't shine,
when the shadows are long,
when you're all outta time,
when the people you love you cannot comprehend,
when you want to be real but can only pretend;
wherever you are,
whatever your care,
God is already there.


When the road makes a turn,
when the detour is long,
when the war has begun,
when the border is drawn,
when you're dying to sing
but you can't hear the song,
when your left becomes right and your right becomes wrong,
when you feel you've arrived but not sure you belong,
when you're true when you're blue,
when you're weak when you're strong;
wherever you are,
whatever your care,
God is already there.


this was sent to me in email.

most of the times, its easy to give praise and thanksgiving when things are going our way...but when trials would come and problems would arise, its so hard to remember that He is there in our midst.

let this poem remind us how faithful he is to all of us, no matter what, come what may.

rach

Friday Post!

TGIF!!!!

The coming of the weekend always feels great especially if I feel like I have worked hard through the week. But a bummer. I strained my back muscle again. I think it's a combination of the swim on Monday, the intensive tennis session with Z on Tuesday, and lying on my stomach the entire night while sleeping which caused this old injury. That means I will be the POM POM girl tomorrow during badminton, ladies (without the POM POMs) . :)

I love the song Juls taught us on Wednesday during CG. It is a lovely song. Thanks Juls.

I wanted to say I really love this other song on our webby since the first time I heard it many years ago, till now. Very ministering. Thanks for putting the song up. :)

I Could Sing Of Your Love Forever

Over the mountains and the sea,
Your river runs with love for me,
and I will open up my heart and let the Healer set me free.

I'm happy to be in the truth,
and I will daily lift my hands:
for I will always sing of when Your love came down.

[Yeah!]I could sing of Your love forever,
I could sing of Your love forever,
I could sing of Your love forever,I could sing of Your love forever.

[Repeat] Oh, I feel like dancing -it's foolishness I know;
but, when the world has seen the light,
they will dance with joy,like we're dancing now.

Isn't it amazing to be in love with Jesus? I love the feeling, and I never want to feel differently. I pray that all of us will have a revelation of Jesus love for us, not just in our minds, but in our hearts. May all of us experience Him personally and intimately!